Happy Friday everyone!
This post is the first of my Wedding Series, where I address your questions and curiosities.
This is also a great chance for me to share many Wedding photos with all of you!
DropCam asked me to write this post to pitch-in to their Wedding Campaign, #PreppinForTheBigDay (I’m not receiving any kind of monetary reward or gift for this, I am purely just contributing to a fun round up of Blog posts).
My post is going to be on: enjoying your engagement while planning the biggest event of your life.
Once your day has come and gone, you can’t go back and re-do your engagement. You only get one, and I believe it’s so important that you really get to enjoy it!
(all photos from www.driverphoto.net)
We were not always like this. Marco and I were best friends before we started dating. When we first started dating, we were both on Cloud 9. When we got engaged, that all started to change. I, Mrs. Schmidt, started thinking of everything that could go wrong, all of the reasons we might not work, everything felt like a bigger deal to me. I started nit-picking (I was terrified). I kept thinking “wait… is he going to do that forever? Am I going to be okay with that?” I really was afraid. I wasn’t ready. So, what did I do? I went to a Counselor. I figured there were probably some fears that I needed work out. When my Counselor saw that I was engaged, he suggested that Marco come with me. So, he did, and we stuck with that Counselor for a long 8 months. We put in the work, and it was hard, but so incredibly good. We came out of Counseling ready to plan our Wedding, and so confident that we could get through anything together. My mind was rested, and I was ready. Get Counseling, it’s not a bad thing. It doesn’t mean there is anything wrong with you. It’s truly such an amazing way to get to know your fiancé more, and prepare for marriage.
Read Books Together
During our engagement, we studied too. We read “Things I Wish I’d Known Before We Got Married” and “Before You Plan Your Wedding…Plan Your Marriage” These are two fantastic premarital books, and it’s fun to read them together! I read out loud, and Marco listened. We’d take our books to the beach, on hikes, and read late at night — we’d make dates out of it 🙂
When people offer to help, oh my goodness, accept it! I gladly accepted help when Marco’s Grandma offered to do the flowers and make my Wedding Jewelry, when her friend offered to do our cake, when his Aunt offered to do the favors, chalkboard art, programs, Rehearsal Dinner, when my cousin and Aunt offered to do my Bridal Shower, when my sister in law and Maid of Honor planned my Bachelorette, when my Momma and Marcos Parents offered to help financially, when my Mom did my veil… oh my… I could go on! I sure did a lot on my own, but these people took the biggest weight off my shoulders. When you accept help, detach yourself from the outcome so you don’t go into control mode and stress yourself out. Remember that no matter what, you’re going to come out of your Wedding Day married to your husband, and ultimately, that’s what really matters — you won’t notice details that day anyway!
Keep Final Decisions Between You And Your Fiance
So many people will have opinions about what you should and shouldn’t do. Remember, after your Wedding Day, it’s you and your honey makin’ decisions together. Start practicing before the Wedding Day!
Don’t Forget To Keep Dating!
Date, date, date! Yes, you’ll be busy with planning, but don’t forget to keep dating. Go on walks together, hike together, go to the beach with your friends, have dinner dates, have so much fun! Make your engagement one to remember.
Know That It’s Okay To Argue Or Disagree
Just because you’re engaged does not mean that the two of you are expected to get along perfectly. Marriage is two imperfect people joining together as one, under God. Yes, engagement is a really fun time, but that doesn’t mean that it’s all happy and smiles… You’re still in a relationship with another human being. Expect that you will have disagreements, talk through them, and meet each other halfway… or somewhere towards the middle (since nothing is ever exactly 50/50, and that’s okay too!). Relationships are not perfect, don’t expect them to be.
Don’t Break The Bank On Your Wedding Day
Seriously, here! Decide with your fiance what you want to spend, and stick to it! Your day will come and go so quickly! Only do what you can afford. You’re going to have a great time regardless if there are towering flower arrangements all over the venue. Keep it elegant, clean, simple, and affordable. I used theknot.com to create a budget (and plane everything else, it’s amazing!). I’ll do another post on budgeting for a Wedding 🙂
Keep Your Guest Count Low For A More Personal Feel
My family took up a huge portion of our Guest list. I have a huge family. Here, take a look at our two families…
When we first started planning and going over the Guest List, we decided on 130 people. We invited 160, assuming that 130 would show up. 131 RSVP’d yes, and 126 came. We paid for 127. It was perfect! Anyway… I’m getting beside the point… Pick a number, and stay as close to it as you can (it’s normal for 80% of the people you invite to show up). Invite the people who know you and who will be there to support you through your marriage. We invited the people who we are close to — they watched us grow up, and we are still in contact with them. We didn’t invite everyone we went to High School with, only the ones we’re still close to. This made our Wedding feel intimate and personal. We loved it. And so did everyone else.
Don’t Stress Over Details
On your Wedding Day, you have to try and look at everything. You hardly have a chance to see what the cake looks like, what the flowers look like, and what your decorations look like. Hopefully you have some great photographers (like we did) so you can look back at everything and see how it all looked. Your day truly is so full and busy. All this to say, just don’t worry. Let things go, save your money, don’t overspend, don’t worry, everything will be just fine and look beautiful. And really, you’re not going to care! You’re too happy/distracted to notice a thing on your special day.
If You Can, Go All-Inclusive
Our Venue was the most helpful place I could have ever hoped for. Planning was so fun for me because of the Wedgewood (Buenaventura)! I would 100% recommend them to anyone who is getting married. Everything is there. All you have to do is tell them what you want, fill out your Bridal Binder, have your appointments, bring your decorations/Program/favors/etc… and show up! It’s soo nice, and it is NOT more expensive. I repeat, it is not more expensive. If anything, we saved money going through the Wedgewood.
If you have any questions, please ask in the comments below.
If you’ve been a bride and want to second anything I’ve said or add in your own tips/thoughts, please do so in the comments below.
I’m excited to hear your thoughts 🙂